HMS Undefeated (aka the 4s) set sail to the Isle of Catz to claim victory against the 5s – and victory we found! Lots of pre-match banter occurred, with a lot of fraternising happening between teams – also a bit of team swappage as the 4s' skipper gave Tom R back to the 5s for a one-week loan (for an undisclosed sum), whilst debutant James S was kept in the 4s team, putting in a solid performance.

Ky and James subsequently had much fun at the back-chatting about James’s honeymoon – apparently he went to Sri Lanka and had much fun. Happy that we had found out about James’s honeymoon, we decided that was our warm-up done.

Afterwards, the game itself was pretty Hockey-like. The ball was passed, tackles were made etc. etc.

Other things that happened/we discovered:

• Lino gets angry at the defence when they let in goals.

• Andy T lost his phone.

• The 4s scored from 2 shorts (new record).

• Rob Barton educated Dave M on hockey rules.

• Jan loved saying ‘up 10’.

• Tom South doesn’t think shoes are an important part of hockey…

• A half-time team talk about bees doesn't rally the troops.

• Charlie doesn’t like being subbed and comes back onto the pitch regardless.

• Shahzad didn’t make the team photo as he was late.

• City beat Ely 4s 15-0, and we are due to play them shortly…

• Warm-ups are not really our team’s thing.

• Ian M took a penalty flick after Lino took out Dave M.

• When the skipper says "You're in defence", the 4s' players think that means "You're a forward".

• Rasmus’s choice of a headband was dubious.

• Jan pushed in front of people to get his drink first at teas and then demanded the skipper should pay for his beverage.

• The curry went down nicely afterwards with the 4s being the most sociable of any team by far.

• We learnt at the curry that Simon F is now current Goal King - however his team hasn't won a single match? Sign of a good/bad captain?

• Tom P hasn’t played a single game but has been to 3 socials (lad).

• Dave Aston was jealous of Tom’s shirt (number 5).

• The 4s now have pom-poms, usage of which is mandatory if you are a sub.

Ian M in action