It was dark and wet and we did our best to brighten things up playing in our yellow strip. Even our sole supporter, a certain señore Rosselli, was adorned in a Motts issued hi-viz yellow coat. The matched started with a request for ball change by the Ely keeper, “Please don’t use orange, it clashes with their shirts”, so a dark pink ball was used instead.

Ely 4s looked a good and confident side, with their 3s having comprehensively beaten our 5s earlier in the day, but this was to be a different game and soon, the speed of Nathan, the cunning of Boris and the finishing of Rupert put us 2-0 ahead, with no small contributions from Joe and Ian M master minding the midfield.

Another Bolt-like speedy run from Nathan destroyed the Ely defence and his shot/cross was tucked in by Alex. Nathan himself went on to score one to make it 4-0 at half time

The scoreline and the game was a touch more even in the second half. The Ely defence learnt to cope with Nathan’s speed better and maybe we were tiring a little too. There were still two news-worthy moments to report however. When Ian Glover’s shot was chested-down by one of the Ely defenders, the umpire duly awarded a penalty but the Ely defender protested in a Chelsea-John-Terry-like-fashion. After some consultation with the other umpire and the video ref. (journalistic licence), it was changed to a short corner which for once we scored from, but was foiled by the umpire awarding another short corner just before the ball went in.

Mr Glover was determined to have the last word on the match by outrageously flicking a cross from the right and it flew in the back of the net to make it 5-0.