Eleven hardy souls set out from Cambridge one bright and breezy morning. Some time later, most of them reached the Little Chef in Boston for a sportsman's breakfast. But wait, were three not missing? What had become of the Vennermobile? Calamity follows Nick Venner like a bloodhound and he had of course taken his leaking motor for a tour of Cambridgeshire/Lincolnshire garages. Not put off by losing forty-five minutes somewhere along the way, he still decreed that he and his passengers should not miss out on their own subsequent carb-fest. Surprisingly, despite the belated arrival in Horncastle, he was in no danger in the Lemon calculations.

Whilst Nick pottered around many miles away, Paul South was sewing up that particular competition at an early stage. For those who might not know, Little Chef is quite different from Burger King - one being a roadside restaurant specialising in cooked breakfasts, the other a 'fast-food' burger joint. Despite the two eateries being housed under the same roof in this instance, the menus are not interchangeable and the staff of Burger King will not, unfortunately, be able to produce eight Olympic Breakfasts in under ten minutes, at a bulk discount price, no matter how many times you wave the Little Chef menu at them.

Having all finally reached Horncastle to be greeted by the sight of the oppo sweeping mud off the pitch, we embarked on a brief loosening and then entered the fray.

Predictably, the opening stages of the game saw us struggle to shake the journey from our caking arteries and adjust to the new combinations in our line-up. Something was awry in midfield, and Joe Whittaker and Matt Kern (the nominal wide ‘forwards’) were having to get through an awful lot of defensive work. Thirty-five minutes of shovelling defence was an unpleasant start to the afternoon, but at least we made it through to the break only one goal down (a short corner being slipped a couple of times before the ball was neatly passed just inside the left post).

Sensing that something needed to change, we decided on a quick switcheroo, with Venner moving up and Kern slotting into a link midfield role. The re-jig showed early promise, making it all the more annoying when we conceded again in relatively short order. The home side were still having the better of it, but with more numbers now pushed up in support of the tireless (/tiring) Paul South, we were carrying our own threat on the break. Finally, a goal for the good guys came. Cooper smashed the ball at South, who diverted it via a couple of ricochets to Spencer. Craig slashed it home on the reverse and we were back in the game!

As Horncastle pressed again, Mike Coxe came to the fore with some sterling defensive work, ably backed by the two Toms in the centre. As we looked to grab an equaliser that in truth may have flattered us a little, the home side’s sweeper (who was otherwise excellent throughout) was more than a little fortunate to survive a foot-to-ball incident that prevented Venner from otherwise bearing clean through on goal. Both teams had a couple of half-chances as the final few minutes ticked away, but nothing clear-cut, and Horncastle were able to retain their 100% record that sees them sitting pretty at the summit of the league.

Now famished after nearly two hours without meat and bread, we descended on the excellent pulled pork baps with some relish. The MoM stakes were closely contested and not without controversy. Although Venner just pipped Anns, Rosselli, Spencer and Whittaker by collecting the most votes, his supporters were at pains to point out that their ballot was cast on the basis that they applied only to his second half performance. Should they then perhaps have only been counted as half marks?