Four teams – South M3, South M4, March M2 and Wisbech M4.

Two bits of weather – the first cold snap of winter, which had followed weeks of rain.

Three pitches – South’s beloved home at Long Road suffering from a bit of a chill, the Neale Wade in March being perfectly alright, and Harecroft Road in Wisbech which was flooded, then presumably frozen and finally a lovely mix of mud and ice.

Oodles of emails, texts and phone calls between the various clubs.

End result – South M3 play Wisbech M4 in March, whilst South M4 and March M2 kick their heels because a pitch was frozen. In Bishop’s Stortford. Yeah, didn’t see that one coming, did you?

Having found a playable pitch and a willing opposition, which counted as success already on this rather odd day, there were just two more issues before we could start. i) extract keeper Jason from under the pile of M1 players who had bundled on top of him to celebrate his late, match-winning flick save in the preceding match, and ii) get the March astro floodlights turned on. Which, once it happened, meant the lights were on, but no one was home. HA!

Sorry, sorry. Where was I... Ah yes, the actual game. We started well, pushing Wisbech back. The pressure, and a quick bit of thinking saw us take the lead. The sharp thought came from Chris (well he is at one of the most famous uni’s in the world), who was fouled seemingly in circle, but was awarded a free hit just outside. Rather than bemoan this, Chris simply took it, well before the defence had worked out what was going on. This gave him the space for a five yard dribble and an unchallenged turn into the ‘D’. From there he passed to Rob, whose half-saved shot fell nicely to Paul to bash into the unguarded net.

Wisbech are struggling at the bottom of the division and their heads might have dropped if we had added a second, but try as we might it wouldn’t come. As it stayed close, their confidence grew, leading to a short corner. This forced a second, which was switched back to the injector who put a pintpoint finish inside the far post. With this goal, the hosts belief surged even more and we were in for a tricky game.

Despite this we were the next to register. It again came from sharper thinking than the defence, a square pass from a free hit finding Jan in acres of space. His ball into the circle was blocked, James collected the loose ball and fed Rob, whose shot was again half saved but had just about enough to get over the line. Paul was on hand to add the coup de grace, later discussion deciding he did so from just over rather than just in front of the whitewash.

The half ended with us on the attack and winning a short. Everyone went up, Rob’s first shot was saved but the ball failed to clear the circle and a second chance was forced. This was a scramble at the far post, with the nearest South players claiming the ball had been ‘one or two centimetres over the line’. However given the thicket of legs and sticks the umpire couldn’t be sure, and from the lack of South teammates appealing for the goal, he was far from the only one.

We didn’t have long to wait for a third, though. The goal stemmed from a sideline hit on our 25. Ed was over the ball, and receiving conflicting advice from teammates, some shouting ‘Hit Rob early’ and others yelling ‘No, leave it for the defence!’, Ed ignored the naysayers (Douglas!) and threaded a fifty yard pass through the one yard corridor open to him up the line. This set Rob free to race unopposed into the circle. He drew the keeper towards him, checked reverse and swept into the far corner from a narrow angle.

The second half had begun with us playing an experimental new formation, which was basically putting every player in their natural positions. This put more pressure on both defences, and was abandoned after it saw us giving away a short from which Wisbech scored, moving the ball neatly between first receiver and right slip, the receiver flicking home.

The rest of the game saw us pushing for the match-killing fourth, whilst fretting secretly about letting in a sucker punch goal. The tension was finally relieved inside the final few minutes, as Ed wriggled past a couple of challenges on halfway, broke down the left wing, played a one-two with Ian and beat the keeper with a nice early shot placed just inside the near post [for the golfers out there think a ball aimed down the left edge of the fairway with just a touch of fade to keep it on the short stuff]

Two wins out of two so far this year. Next up will be an interesting challenge against promotion chasing Alford 1sts.