It was a crisp Saturday morning as New Belgian Alex waited for his ride. He had come to this country with nothing but a bag of chocotoff, a hockey stick and hope for a better life. Two of those had already disappeared. But he had seen things on the hockey pitch in the last few weeks that he had never seen before: a player called Anns picking out a ball from above his head with one hand and then injuring himself the next game by simply trying to turn; Coops, the captain, had split defences open with his earth shattering hit - including his own; there was even a player who was an undercover cop during the day and a Karl Pilkington stunt double at night. This new team was very unconventional. He had no idea what would happen as he stepped on to the cold pitch.

The game started off brightly. The ball whizzed around the pitch as Cambridge South pushed for the opening goal. The opposition scampered into their D, cowering in front of their goal, praying for the constant onslaught to end. This caused turbulence in South's usual fluid hockey. Napoleonic Nev, ever the supreme tactician, seized the opportunity. Taking inspiration from the autumn internationals, he combined hockey and rugby to create hugby and rucked the ball into the goal. Unorthodox, yet effective.

NBA was so star struck he completely missed the opposition scoring a goal. It did not matter. Within minutes, James, one of the few racketeering orthodontists this side of the Atlantic, had plundered into their D and slipped the ball under their keeper. All in a days work for some. But this buccaneer had not finished. Minutes later, he deflected the ball into the top starboard side of the net, adding another brace to his plentiful booty of goals.

At some point between these goals and Coops getting a yellow card for wrestling with a thirteen year old, the opposition had somehow managed to penetrate our defense and come away with another goal. This game was too close for comfort. This, however, was not very evident from South's gameplay. They continued to casually play the ball around, unfazed by the occasional counterattack launched by the other team. Their cool heads paid off as they left the field with three points, although it was far from an inspiring victory.

New Belgian Alex left with questions still unanswered. Why are South so inconsistent? Did Menzies's hairdresser really not realise he's middle class and doesn't want that haircut? Is Ali Edge ever sad? Why does Peterborough exist? NBA didn't know much, but he knew this; a day out with South's M2s is never boring.