Why a match report on a walkover? Well, the three awarded points took the M3s to the brink of the Division 5NW title, and then over it when news broke later in the day that the only team who could have finished ahead of us, Bourne Deeping 4ths, had been held to a 2-2 draw at Louth.

That left us eight points clear of the pack, with just one or two games to play. Therefore Champions! Whohoo!

As with the previous time the M3s got promoted from this division, a few pen pics on the players responsible. All numbers are league games only and edit - are now updated to include the final match at Horncastle.

N.B. Excluding those with just one game to their names, of which there were another fourteen in addition to those covered below!

2016-17 squad notes

George Toynton – Goalkeeper – 9 appearances, 4 clean sheets

Came into our side at Christmas, and has led from the back ever since. Mostly to the pub. A class keeper, who we have been delighted to have as our regular stopper in the second half of the season.

Lino Di Lorenzo – Goalkeeper – 4 apps, 2 clean sheets

Lino, who was also one of the M3s’ keepers the last time we went up, was back at the start of the season. And then a new baby put rather a crimp on his involvement. The games he played were at his usual high level, however.

Matt Saint-Gower – ‘The Saint’ – Goalkeeper – 4 apps, 1 clean sheet

Another quality keeper, another with a baby on the way. They’re a randy bunch, our shot stoppers. Anyway, yes, solid, reliable, much appreciated in the games he has played.

Joe Whittaker – ‘Mr Versatility’ – Goalkeeper, Defender, Midfield, might yet play Forward – 16 apps, 6 goals outfield, 1 app, 0 clean sheets in goal

The ultimate squad man, apart from that three week mid-season jaunt to San Francisco. Play anywhere, and do it well. Keeps wanting to play up front, keeps being promised it, keeps finding that South skippers have cried wolf. Also made the trip up to Skegness with the M2s to beat Alford, which is a step towards the rest of the team avoiding that journey next campaign. So player of the season, then?

Jan Brynjolffssen – Defender – 19 apps, 0 goals

Skipper, right-back, occasional sweeper, consistent control freak. Also in the running for Lemon of the season (see ‘control freak’). Repeatedly got very angry with his team for not particularly obvious reasons, what with us finishing in the highest league position the M3s have ever achieved. Needs to calm down a bit and let the guys play.

Ellis Liu – Defender – 5 apps, 0 goals

Youngish defender who dropped down to the M4s on the Night of the Long Knives (on which more later). A solid player in the tackle with a good work rate and reading of the game, he could easily feature more often in Division 4 next season. If he is still around, that is…

Chris Matson – Defender, occasional Midfielder – 18 apps, 0 goals

Started in defensive midfield but then dropped back to centre-back after a change in our standard formation and has made the position his own. The legs of the defence and the arms as well, which seem to telescope out to nick the ball from opposition centre-forwards, who must be sick of the sight of him. Also added some sparkling forward runs to his game and is unlucky not to have scored a goal. Still has another left year of his degree, so hopefully we will get at least one more season of his excellence.

Dave Monck – ‘The Monckosaurus’ – Defender, sometime Forward – 14 apps, 5 goals

The Monckosaurus was our top scorer last season, hitting double figures. He wasn’t as prolific this campaign, but then he didn’t need to be as others were chipping in well. Still hammered in four short corners and, when let off the leash up front in March, scored his first goal from open play since the Cretaceous period. There was also a distinct correlation between times when Dave was subbed off at the end of the game and matches where we dropped points (Bourne away, Louth away, March away). You would think the skippers would learn after two, wouldn’t you…?

Neil Sneade – ‘Mr Cambridge South’ – Defender – 18 apps, 0 goals

Club Secretary and left-back. Neil commented before the season that the M3s didn’t want to get promoted, as we are comfortable in Division 5NW. By which one should read, ‘Neil likes winning.’ That certainly proved the case as he was arguably the most passionate in search of a promotion that he hadn’t actually wanted. Has talked of dropping down to the M4s next season. If this comes to pass his ability to wriggle out of tight spots on the left flank will be sorely missed.

James Tanner – ‘JT’ – Defender – 10 apps, 1 goal, 1 yellow card

JT took the position of libero to a new level in our game at City 6ths. Nominally the sweeper, he seemed to spend the entire half camped on the City 25! Also scored a goal against St Neots 3rds by waiting upfield until the counter-counter-attack could reach him following an attacking short. Got our only yellow of the season in a sparky game at March.

Raj Bhopal – Defender, Midfielder – 9 apps, 2 goals

Former Cambridge University Cricket 1st XI, and put his significant hand-eye ability and fitness to good use as a versatile player in defence and midfield. Chipped in with goals at home to Horncastle, and a settler away to Louth in what was an important point in the M3s' season.

Alex Scally – Defender, Winger – 9 apps, 1 goal

Alex’s contribution this term was undoubtedly good and would definitely have been even greater but for a recurring injury that saw him out for a month on two separate occasions. Initially playing as a winger, an absence of certain regulars saw him moved back into defence at Bourne Deeping, where a very solid performance confirmed his ability in that role as well. Fingers cross that the injuries heal over the summer and he can get a full season in next term.

Jonny Camp – Midfielder – 2 apps, 1 goal

Stylish central midfielder, Jonny, only appeared for the 3rds a couple of times but did sweep in a nice finish on his debut against Ely. Now up in the M2s' squad and also appeared for the M1s in a friendly.

Max Holgate – Midfielder – 9 apps, 0 goals

Teenager Max proved to be a serial man-of-the-match award winner. He got that on his first appearance for the club for the M4s, which was the only time he turned out for Greavsie's side, as reports of his performance meant the M3s immediately nicked him. He promptly was MoM in three of his first four M3s games, and in fact finished the season in the M2s squad. We wish him well in that and will remind him not to forget where he (nearly) started when we meet next in opposition next season!

Ollie Kenzie – Midfielder – 11 apps, 1 goal

A human yo-yo and possible inspiration for Chumbawumba, Ollie has bounced between the 3s and 4s more times than I care to remember… but really he is a 3rd teamer and we all know it. Hence why he keeps coming back up again. In the M3s to stay this time (barring a massive influx of midfielders in the summer), Ollie brings skill and drive to the centre of the pitch.

Matt Kern – Midfielder – 8 apps, 2 goals

Matt can be considered the M3s' talisman, as he was part of the team that last got promoted from 5NW to 4NW. Started the season with the M2s but found it hard to get a decent run at his best position in central midfield, so dropped down to us where his ability and experience has been very appreciated.

Ash Dookun – Midfielder, Winger – 3 apps, 0 goals

Livewire midfielder who made a handful of solid guest appearances for us but has mostly starred for the M4s this campaign. Brings pace, drive and skill to whatever side he appears for and may well feature more often for the M3s next campaign…

Matt Smith – Midfielder, Winger – 2 apps, 1 goal

Saturday work has meant we haven’t seen anything like as much of teenager Matt as we would have liked based on his two league performances, both against St Ives, and some other very strong showings in friendlies. Matt will always have a significant place in the M3s' history, as he scored the promotion-clinching goal.

Paul South – Midfielder, Forward – 3 apps, 1 goal

An M3s stalwart for many seasons, Paul netted one of the three goals in the early season win over City 6ths that was one of the first indications that we were a serious promotion candidate. Unfortunately, soon afterwards players rolling down the club from other teams who played the same position as Paul saw him displaced to the M4s, where he now contributes significantly instead.

Ed Boggis – Winger – 12 apps, 4 goals

Vice-captain Ed has a remarkable ability to let the ball seemingly run away from him to sucker defenders into diving in, only for Ed to suddenly stretch out, nick the ball through and emerge with it in space behind his man. Also possesses good pace, so can turn those beaten men into very dangerous situations, and an eye for goal.

Will Jones – Winger – 15 apps, 2 goals

Teenaged winger who joined South from St Ives in the summer, and has made the wing position his own…whenever he can’t get Liverpool tickets! Lively on the dribble, with an eye for a pass and a fierce shot, which was showcased in possibly the highlight of his season, scoring against his old teammates as the M3s won 3-1 at St Ives 3s.

James Mathews – Midfielder, Winger, Forward – 5 apps, 0 goals

Peripatetic talent, who swaps sides the way some others swap [something the like swapping a lot, please fill in your own metaphor here]. James left the M3s at the start of 2015-16, played a game for Bury M3s against South, came back to the M3s, departed again at the start of 2016-17, played half a season for Mid Somerset 1s, returned to the M3s, featured prominently in five games for us and earned elevation to the M2s, which his play definitely warranted. A significant contributor to the M3s' promotion, he’ll be missed. Yet again.

Tom Steed – Winger, Forward – 2 apps, 1 goal

Tom, the son of M4s' vice-captain Howard, is a talented teenager who we would really like to bring on. Unfortunately, school sport demands mean he is rarely available on Saturdays, leaving the closer away games of the M4s as a more viable option. Remains one for the future.

Rob Barton – Forward – 9 apps, 6 goals

The most controversial casualty of the evening when five players were moved to the M4s squad. Rob has been a mainstay of the M3s' forward line for a number of seasons and can count our title triumph as his own, having made telling contributions to many games in the opening half of the campaign. His trademark reverse stick strikes remain in the M3s as commemoration by…

Jason James – ‘JJ’ – Forward – 17 apps, 5 goals

Jason has taken his role of Cultural Attaché for the People’s Republic of South Africa very seriously, disseminating South Africa ways to us heathen Brits, whilst attempting to cherry pick what might be of value from the local culture. Even as he must be wondering exactly why his government have provided him with the M3s' WhatsApp group as his sole tool for exploring the local landscape. The lesson that the South M3s' centre-forward must, wherever possible, shoot at goal from his reverse side was quickly assimilated. Other issues have needed deeper explanations, the seeking of which has provided much merriment going into games and many LoM awards. Dawg. More seriously, Jason’s superb stand-up skills have added nicely to the M3s' attacking options.

Simon Ta – ‘Mr Punctuality’ – Forward – 17 apps, 16 goals

Simon has been the M3s most dangerous attacking threat throughout the entire campaign, as reflected by his goal a game return. And it would have been more, if his fellow forwards hadn’t cleared goalbound shots by Si from opponent’s goallines, something which appears to happen to him bewilderingly often. Si brings pace and guile to the M3s' front line, as well as coolness under pressure; his chipped finish over a logging keeper after 68 minutes at Peterboro of a game still standing at 0-0 being typical of his ability to deliver key goals to our cause.

Nev Warren – Forward – 7 apps, 1 goal

One of the influx of players we have had this season from Saffron Walden, Nev has skill in abundance and a seriously strong hockey brain on him. When we are playing well, Nev is the lynchpin around which our attack revolves. Also, like JJ, his ability on the ball is very high, allowing Nev to work in tight spaces and earn free-hits and short corners to the cause since he came into the team early in 2017.