What I Did On My Holidays

George Toynton

This is how the game went in my head, we took a very very short drive to the seaside, had carpool karaoke competition on the way up. The car sunroof was open with the sunglasses on, it was a very hot day. As a team sitting on the top of the table after winning every game we went into this full of confidence, we were definitely going to win and win well. As everyone in our team really wants to play and no one ever drops out on the day.

But this is all lie.

Yes we did play car pool karaoke, but no one knew what Nev was singing, and yes I was hoping to put sunglasses on but I felt it was a bit cold for that, plus it was pouring down. Our car “the Essex boys” me Nev and Sev were clearly the healthiest in the team as we passed up the opportunity to have McDonald’s, as we are dedicated athletes (we had more time in bed instead).

When our car arrived perfectly on time as normal, we were surprised to see the unhealthy guys there early, and warming up, I naturally wanted to join in as it was bloody freezing!!! It was a really good warm up. But this didn’t last long, as HE WHO WILL NOT BE NAMED hit a ball at my arm meaning I had to start the game with an ice pack tape to my arm, what FUN. The most annoying bit about this was the fact it was my first time in arm pads in years.

The game kicked off at a slow damp pace, the team looked really good at marking but for some reason forgot that a defensive play needs someone to go and press the ball, unfortunately this took us some time to remember. In the first half they scored a goal.

At half time we had a chat, I moaned a bit.

In the second half we started to run off the ball, it was good to see this as this led to us getting a lot more of the ball and lots more shots. We had them pend back in there half of the pitch for decent spells, then the moment happened it was a awesome!! fantastic!! worldly of a......tap In after a goal mouth scramble, well done Tom whatever your surname is?? Blair? Dave?? Then shortly after this South used the wings for another well worked chance, this would definitely have be goal of the season (probably not) but somebody took lessons in shooting from me and kicked it, oh [dear]. So that was that, the game ended 1-1, to my astonishment we finished a game without any injuries, apparently my injured wrist doesn’t count, as was most likely caused by me marking furiously on my own.

The showers were very very hot, I’m not sure if this was because i was very very cold or not. The rest of the team got to hear Nev's singing voice too. We in the 3s are a helpful bunch and when Matt told the team he had a bad back and couldn’t pick anything up from the floor, we gave him pain killers. The pain killers were put on the floor. We are helpful not intelligent. The teas were in a small pub decorated for Halloween definitely very scary. We had some kind of soup, I was being very helpful and handing them out to the team. I didn’t hand out the bread as this was for both teams. I guess I should have now, 'cos this got me my lemon vote.

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20
Tom Blair
Player of the Match

He scored a goal. We need goals

George Toynton
Lemon of the Match

Asked Nev if he could **** his ****