Eighteen, You Say?

Rob Barton
  1. On the day when our L3s won 18-0, possibly a club record, this match report will honour this achievement by being delivered in eighteen bullet points.
  2. As a club we scored forty-four and conceded twenty-two today: nice symmetry.
  3. James almost got left behind when he was a bit late and JJ assumed he was going direct, which he then had to.
  4. Spalding have a half-built changing room and clubhouse, due to be finished by Christmas.
  5. The scoring went something like this: 0-1, 0-2, half time, 0-3, 0-4, 0-5, 1-5, 2-5, full time.
  6. All their goals were from short corners.
  7. Our first goal was from a short but second was from open play.
  8. The first goal was deflected off Pete’s shin to wrong foot Mike.
  9. The second smacked into James’ foot, they reacted first to finish.
  10. The third, Dave tried to pick the ball out but it squeezed into the corner.
  11. The fourth, a man free on the far post slapped convincingly home.
  12. The fifth was a simple, straight shot just inside the post and straight through Jan, who saw it late.
  13. The sixth, our first, was John slapping in after a good follow-up from a short corner.
  14. The seventh, our second, was a great break away from Oli, penetrating the D and squaring to Danny to deflect home.
  15. Voting was split for both the pop-themed MoM (Danny, James, Mike and Josh) and LoM (JJ and Rob) awards.
  16. Rob failed to score so remains on 399 club goals.
  17. Geri is actually Mike’s favourite Spice Girl.
  18. If you Google “spice girls members” it says, “Geri - vocals, Mel C - vocals, Mel B - vocals, Emma B - vocals, Victoria B - backing vocals.”


Jan Brynjolffssen 3 weeks, 5 days ago

The 5th was Spalding's fifth. Our first was the sixth of the game. i.e. it went 0-2, half-time, 0-5, 2-5.

Rob Barton 3 weeks, 5 days ago

Thanks, Jan, I had wondered if that was the case; now duly updated.

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Danny McCree
Man of the Match

The Mel B of the team: scares the opposition, probably hasn't had Eddie Murphy's baby

Joshua Holmes
Man of the Match

The Emma B of the team: everyone's favourite, probably knows Robbie Williams

Mike Gillingham
Man of the Match

The Geri of the team: bosses from the back with a cheeky grin, likes Formula One

James Hayes
Man of the Match

The Mel C of the team: can actually play a bit, doesn't have any moobs

Rob Barton
Lemon of the Match

The Celeste Cruz of the team: booed off stage, doesn't know who Eminem is

Jason 'JJ' James
Lemon of the Match

The Daphne DiConcetto of the team: booed off stage, can talk about shoes for an hour