The first game ever in Div 5NW for the M5s looked to be a challenge: facing our own M4s. A cumulative goal difference of twelve for vs thirty-five against from previous encounters between these sides proved a poor predictor, with the M5s ending up two-nil winners on this occasion. How did this happen?

A bit of espionage, tapping into the M4s’ motivational team messages beforehand, helped galvanise things, as did seventy minutes of 100% effort, chasing down every ball and every opponent.

Midfield dynamo Jim HALL produced much of the VOLTS of electricity to great EFFECT (one for the scientists there), and scored a spectacular breakaway opening goal. He pounced onto a trademark Monckosaurus thunderbolt 16m hit and swept the ball imperiously past the experienced M4 goalkeeper.

The M4s never gave up but were prevented from asserting their rightful status by constant harassment in midfield by the mighty Marshman/Hall/South/South/Ta/Ta, stoic defence from Alston/Monck/Creed/Grove/Hartley/Harvey, impenetrable goalkeeping from skipper Gardiner, and annoying frontline distractions from Barton/Grove/Greaves to keep the M4s preoccupied.

It might have appeared that all sixteen M5s were on the pitch simultaneously but we stuck to the regulation eleven in reality.

The second half was more of the same and as the M4s pressed harder, openings appeared for the M5s in attack. The second goal came from a simple short corner routine, out to the effervescent Simon Ta in his white furry halo. Whack. Goal.

M4s were inevitably disappointed but will come back and threaten the promotion places. They have the skill, the team play, the energy. As for M5s? More of the same please.

MoM… by common consensus, the whole team.