The only way I know how to write a report
Joshua SpellmooreAbstract - the bit you read if you just want to know what happened and cba to read the rest
In a highly anticipated clash between two top-of-the-table teams, Cambridge South M4s faced off against Wisbech Town 3s in a nail-biting hockey match. The first half was a closely contested battle, ending in a goalless draw at 0-0. However, the second half saw a breakthrough, with Cambridge South M4s securing a whopping 1-0 victory, thanks to a trademark finish from Charlie.
Introduction
Coming into the game Cambridge South M4s had started the season flying with 4 wins from 4, with performances so impressive that supporters were gathering at Long Road early to get the prime seats. They even sat through the M1s match to keep their seats for the best view of the free-flowing McCree-Ball that the M4s play, you could even here people whispering comments such as “when does this game finish, I’m here to see the M4s” [1].
There was also added tension building up before the game as striker Charlie (CCR7) Curedale-Rayner, despite a scintillating MoM performance last week, had been demoted to the 4s by umpire Adam. CCR7 looked laser focussed before the game and you would be forgiven for predicting a few ‘accidental’ hits going in Adam’s direction and some cards shown the opposite way. But it was impossible to tell whether the fierce look was because he had a point to prove or if he was simply trying to shake off the “adorable” image that he has apparently picked up [2].
Wisbech Town 3s had also started the season in a winning fashion, being the only other team taking 12 points from 12 available [3]. They certainly weren’t going to be a pushover and South were going to have to work to get the full 3 points, this was always going to be a close one.
Pre match prediction “I’m backing the boys to win again” [4]
Method
Try to score more goals than the other team.
Results
The first half showcased a fierce battle for control of the game, ultimately it ended 0-0 and the second half was all to play for.
South stepped up their game in the second half with a few noticeable performances that picked up PoM votes:
Kieran B – Ghosting through their midfield as if they weren’t there, he’s getting better by the week.
Jordan B – brilliant positioning, passing, and slapping into the D.
Danny M – Rock Solid at the back
Ben L – keeping us 1-0 up with great saves.
Tom & Phil – solid defensively and great attacking support
But ultimately the true PoM was sealed when Charlie picked up the ball in the opposition D mid-way through the second half. He scored a typical CCR7 goal which would later prove to be crucial for the M4s. Celebrations erupted, with the crowd cheering, team members surrounding him, an awkward chest-bump / hug followed by a big “aww” from the fans and a certain umpire left flushed red in the face. That’s 2 PoMs in a row for Charlie now, can he make it a hattrick next week?
After the goal South tried to stretch their lead to 2-0 however missed a couple of glorious opportunities with Jim powering through the Wisbech defence only to end up forgetting to pass or shoot as he entered the D, and Andy edging just past the back post after a swift counterattack down the left flank. Sadly that 2-0 lead never came.
Deep into the second half South’s defence remained resilient, they had Wisbech clutching at straws as the latter resorted to throwing on a striker for a defender to desperately try and pinch a goal. Wisbech did win a plethora of short corners, however they didn’t stand a chance in converting them as South had fantastic Phil M, who was running out to the top of the D quicker than the ball, and great saves from goalkeeper Ben L who was fuelled by a delicious looking full English [5].
Happily, South showed unbelievable character to defend the 1-0 advantage and see out the game for a win. During the post-match team talk credit was given to the whole team for not losing their heads [6], although this cannot be said for the whole team. Joshua Spellmoore decided he wanted to make the game a bit more interesting by earning his first ever green by doing something that “Even NASA couldn’t figure out what that was for” [7].
Conclusions – The second bit where you summarize everything you just wrote.
- South M4s won 1-0 and keep their winning streak up ensuring they are cemented at the top of the league.
- They are now the only team in the league to have a 100% record after beaten Wisbech and March 2s dropping points against Ely 2s.
- The M4s have now increased their fanbase and are looking forward to the away support next week in March.
References – the bit where you cram a lot of sources in to prevent the possibility of being done for plagiarism.
[1] Wilson-Toy, O. (2023). General chat on the touchline. Retrieved from: Spellmoore, J’s memory.
[2] Multiple male and female members of the club. (2023). Post Pay and Play chat. The Queen Edith Pub.
[3] Hockey, E. (2023). Div 4 NW Table. https://east.englandhockey.co.uk/competitions/2022-2023-4231403-adult-east-mens-group-4232402-east-mens-division-4-north-west/table?season=3d87a2df-f97d-47a1-8371-b8e5267c5360&competition-group=d2d99a69-69e8-43e2-a151-07970590759a&competition=a5c1f922-da4a-44f9-a5eb-650dbcf2ee60&match-day=
[4] Brynjolffssen, J. (2023). 14/10 preview. Spond. – read it if you haven’t, he does a great job.
[5] Lye, B. (2023). Prepping… . M4s Whatsapp chat.
[6] Unknown source. (2023). Yes boys great win. Post match team talk.
[7] REDACTED. (2023). Do you need to vent? Post match discussions.
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