“Take me home, A14, to the place, where I belong! Cambridge South, by the astro, take me home, A14.” I gently close the piano lid. My neighbours will have to pay me, to hear one note more. I get up, pick up my mug of Twynings Earl Grey, as I gently stride towards the window. As I gaze out to the hazy sunset, the warmth of the cup against my hands, I recall the season past in my mind’s eye. Every training session, every game. Every build up to every goal, scored and conceded. Everything lemony thing that I or my teammate did. 

Everything I could have done better. 

With the cup now cold, I lay it down - it was nearly empty by now anyway. And I think to myself: How will I pass the time until the next Sunrise? I eventually chuckle to myself. I’m sure I’ll find something to do… afterall, there’s more often than not, things to do, before you rest your weary head.

On a lovely Spring morning, 14 of South’s most available men headed north to everyone’s favourite city in Cambridgeshire. After a brief warm-up, we played some jittery hockey for the first 10 minutes, before remembering that we are better than this. We scored an excellent team goal, dispatched by Jack before the half ended, only to concede against the run of play in the 2nd half. Menzies was shown a green card for mogging their midfielders one-too-many times, Riccardo “Seaweed” Nori was up to his usual antics harassing their defense and even had a wonder goal disallowed… yet the real lemon of the day came from a moment of absolute bedlam, when CB Shin pushed LB Matt off the sideline ball, only to aerial it port-side over the massing crowd. Remember, it’s not attempted murder without intent. There were several strong performances too, with Max stepping up out of the shadows and having an excellent all-round game; Ben made a stunning stick-save (has the video, just needs a script before submitting to Netflix for a 3-season spin-off), but the Man of the Hour was Gabe, who recently celebrated his 18th birthday, for a stellar performance against some handy opposition. We wish him well as he continues on to study medicine. 

There was a warm curry-and-pub social afterwards to mark the end of the season… and even though we ended mid-table, perhaps what's more meaningful are the friends we made along the way.

So, in summary, here are today’s players’ performances if we were Cambridge roads.

I hasten to add: Not to be taken too seriously

Ben Lye - Royston Road: More reliable than trains; a noticeable singular level-crossing by Foxton, where all the traffic is halted, to allow a train through. I’m not sure where this metaphor is going, but there are at least 2 good ones in there.

Danny - Teversham Road: An under-rated road on the periphery of Cambridge. Critical in getting to major city landmarks, such as the Fen Ditton McDonalds. 

Tom Anns - Histon road - widened recently, to allow cyclists space on both sides. From the edge of Cambridge, almost a straight road into the heart of the City. Has a speed camera, so slower is safer. 

Jack Chalk - Petty Cury: Pre-dating most of modern Cambridge, yet surrounded by modern shops. Canonical to the History of Cambridge. Worth going for a spin. 

James Menzies - Panton Street - In the heart of Cambridge, somewhat Victorian. Excellent for through-traffic, despite the dogmatic street signs. The pubs nearby are some of the best places to watch your sporting icons play, live. Less mythology than other roads.

Jamie Coltman - M11: The fastest road around Cambridge; doesn’t go close to the city centre, but is excellent for getting to the other end of Cambridge. A handful of turnoffs to other major roads, to and from Cambridge.

Seb Dias - Chesterton Road - A vital pipeline to the City Centre; rather scenic. A few decent pubs to be found by the river. Leads directly and indirectly to 4 crossing points of the river Cam: well-connected.

Christopher Clark - Mill Road - Several flower shops to be found, and home of Vanderlyle; a beloved vegetarian restaurant. Despite its friendly demeanour, there is a Bohemian edge which comes out at night. Has its own festival: Lots to clap about. Pedal-power-preferred: large, noisy, boisterous private-use vehicles not welcome. 

Gabe Wolff - Hill’s Road - Core artery to the south of Cambridge. Excellent schools, and leads directly to the Hospital. Crucial in keeping Cambridge ticking along. 

Ivo Bottomley - Drummer Street - A reliable place to catch buses at the bus depot. Buses are often seen reversing out gracefully from their bays. Can get to most areas across the region from here. Faster than walking. Public transport takes a significant burden off of the roads.

Matt Langley - Sedley Taylor Road - Close to the rugby, and right next to Cambridge South Stadium (a.k.a. Long Road 6th Form). Notably less traffic friendly since the roadworks a few years ago. Friendly place to hang out after a home game.

Riccardo Nori - Station Road - Home of the Cambridge Rail Station, where you can get tickets to rapidly travel anywhere you like (up to 90MPH!)… but watch out for the railway guards who may kick you off your train for not presenting a valid ticket, even if you and all your friends thought you had a valid ticket. But beware: The train timetables are often unreliable, and the train times have a reputation for having regular mishaps. 

Shin Kim - Arbury Road - Gentrification in action. Apart from the odd dilapidated building here and there, generally good for Cambridge, especially its rising house prices. Was recently considered to be renamed a B-road, but mounting local pressure made sure to keep it named as it is. 

Max Knipe - Francis Crick Avenue - Linking Addenbrooke’s Road to Robinson Way (where lies the entrance to LR6F), an underused road right next to the hockey pitch, which has been there all this time. Close to the Hospital, likely to be used more and more as development continues in this area.