Cambridge South came through another close shave, playing without confidence or composure and with a great deal of luck. However, they managed to scrape by courtesy of goals finished by Williams, with a reverse stick scoop, Pearson (although this was probably an own goal in reality, claimed by Pearson who was the nearest) and, with the last touch of the game, McCulloch, who did little throughout the match to deserve his place in the team but managed to increase his tally to 100 (lucky) league goals for the club – 96 of which were scored from short corners.

There was another goal but I can't quite remember who scored it. It was probably Williams, as he got man of the match, and it was probably laced with fortune, fluke and chance.

The real story behind the match was St Neots, who were, quite frankly, robbed of three points. The visiting team played with organisation, style and attacking flair. Fair in the challenge and showing the perfect example of sportsmanship, as always, they could have been awarded at least twenty short corners and were unlucky to have some given against them for one reason or another.

The St Neots centre forward had other ideas where the score line came from, saying, "Cambridge South are without doubt the best team in the league and thoroughly deserve to win the division. I wish I was playing for them."

South managed to lose possession at all given opportunities and almost seemed to be trying to drop points at times. This was typified by Troll's trademark aerial, which he launched behind himself midway through the first half. Unfortunately the hapless Ashton got in the way and accidentally passed the ball to member of his own team, a feat that he had never before, or since, repeated.

Captain Alonso's contributions to match day consisted of forgotten quotes and handbags, Spencer spent more time diving on the floor to try and get free hits than actually playing hockey, and Rimmer broke the record for slowest dribble in the league since Rob Barton went on a mazy run that took on the whole of the opposition and the whole of the second half during a match in 1999.

Other highlights included Ashton doing his first ever aerial pass and Graveling, despite multiple possibilities for easy passes, managing to gently lift the ball into Troll's body as he was sunbathing. Other players who were also undeserving of a mention were Jason, who made a couple of lucky saves, Jamie Inshore-Lifeboat, Virdi – whose only valid contribution in the game was to inform us that 'more' was Hindi for 'a**hole' and Rosselli, who spent the entire game recovering from the world’s biggest fry up.

All in all, South go marching on, although how they manged to do this is a bit of a miracle. It was a bit like watching a cross between Some Mother’s Do 'Ave 'Em and an episode of Mr Bean sometimes. At the end of the match, in typical naïve fashion, Captain Hockley said, "We have hit new peaks. I don’t think we could have possibly played better... there is great power in the dark side... I am so powerful that I can even end matches before the final whistle with my mind." Or something like that.