Oh no, yet another LoM award. Cheers, lads…

Alrighty, match report time then. Still, this one should be a pleasure. There’s a lot of good to reflect on. As someone once said, this is our house!!! This is still our house!!! And it’s all coming together nicely.

Where to start then…

Well I could write about the game. About how well the team played, how the balance and the shape were solid, how the new guys seem to have gelled. About the team cohesion and ever-growing belief. About the energy, the pressing, the defensive resilience. About how it was all pretty much textbook.

I could describe the five diverse yet fantastic goals; how JJ’s penalty corner flick was too fast, how Jamie timed his run-and-nip to perfection, how John’s snapshot was the culmination of sustained pressure, how my instinctive deflection finished a superb, sharp team move, and how Josh earned then dispatched the flick with aplomb. I could do all that. Or…

Or instead I could address this long-unanswered question: if the players were Beano characters, which would they be and why? Here we go then…

Mike - Plug - no, not for the ears, more that he’s the last chance to stop any leaks; a truly fantastic stopper with tiger-like reactions.
Jan - Janitor - now we finally know what Jan is short for; looks after our goal and sweeps up at the back, obviously.
JJ - JJ - there is actually a (newish) character with the same name - freewheeling, freestyle, fun apparently - sounds about right; could be worse, JJ, we could’ve gone with Calamity James.
Pete D - Gnipper - he’s gonna gnip and gnaw away at their winger all game; can be quite yappy; bundle of energy all the same.
Danny - Danny from The Bash Street Kids - leads the rabble by example; he’s champion of the world; oh, oops, wrong book.
Pete R - Lord Snooty - he’s Richer then anyone else, sorry really naff one that; mind you he does defend like he’s in a castle.
Keishi - Minnie the Minx - may look sweet and innocent but he’s secretly tougher than most with a menacing sting.
John - Biffo the Bear - a gentle bear who’s been around the game a while; causes thorn-in-paw trouble to opponents, and occasionally, bang, goal, great storyline.
Ben - The Numskulls’ Edd - bosses the whole show when he’s on; what an asset, a total utility player, is there anything he cannot do?
Josh - Bananaman - seems mild enough off the pitch but transforms into a battling superhero, ever alert for the call to action.
Stu - Ball Boy - seemingly always on the ball, often taking on opponents, often beating them; ball never waivering far from his stick.
Rob - Roger the Dodger - knows all the wily tricks; and dodged the ball on that swing ’n’ miss, oops.
Jo - Ivy the Terrible - crops up when least expected, and always up to mischief in the opposition twenty-three; try not to picture Jo with bunches.
Jamie - Billy Whizz - if you’ve never seen him run his legs are a blur; he must be powered by nuclear fission.