Ahhh, the Wisbech Mixed Tournament, home of fine sunshine and copious amounts of drink-fuelled hockey (see photos for illustrations)… This season Cambridge South HC (masquerading as The Southerners for the event) headed north to meet the finest teams which could be found in the relaxed and sunny setting of Wisbech. The informal nature of the tournament meant that no overall winner was confirmed but popular opinion decreed who it was to be.

On Day One the sun shone and goals flowed, but the Southerners slipped to a 5-0 defeat against Hawaii 5-Nil (Wisbech HC) mainly due to their relaxed start. Jim Thorpe was picked out by the opposition as the main danger. The Southerners did however display some of the skills which later proved to be…well, anyway. The second game, against Something Random, saw Southerners fall foul of some lucky goals (three in fact) whilst skillful twists and turns from those on the attack proved fruitless. Filling the interval between the two games with sleep, sun and beer may not have been the best tactical decision.

South lost the services of Richard York and Pip Noon after the first day; Richard to the seduction of Las Vegas's pleasures, whilst Pip disappeared to…take over the world. We have subsequently learned that (in her own words) Pip's Red, err no Yellow, erm Red (I think) armies were mercilessly crushed having gained control of South America and Asia. She should have followed the team's recommendation of strengthening Iceland and using Australia as a starting base. Pip is now in charge of running a 'Risk' social evening: all those in favour, let the social committee know.

After a day of solid beer drinking and several rather tasty rounds of G'n'T's as the sun went down, the evening social was the undoing of South. Jim T and Will B shamefully retired before 11:00 pm (separately, I may add) but Mick Beasley held the side up with an admirable display of drinking with the North Lincs College students.

Day Two, meant the arrival of Jim Sutcliffe and turned out to be hotter than Day One. The heat really took its toll on those playing. Mick's green complexion and desire to sleep meant a reshuffle to the line-up for the first game, against Lager Louts (Pelicans HC). A mercenary keeper was brought in, allowing Will to move outfield and snatch Southerners' first goal of the tournament with a really nasty bobbling shot. The grass pitch was more suited to the 'raw' play of the Cambridge side but the individual skill of Lager Louts (just two players really) saw them run out winners, by an extremely inflated 6-1.

Tactics came into play for the following game and Haggis Fraser was moved from the heart of defence to replace the resting Jim Thorpe in the role of midfield general. This proved to be successful as South dominated large sections of the following game against Mothballs (Wisbech HC). A brace of goals each from South's Dutch import, Wilco, and Haggis left South in the driving seat, but Mothballs were rescued by a combination of their centre forward and sweeper. These combined to frustrate strikers Sharon and Denise, whilst punishing the mercenary element of South's side. Manfully, Mick even made it on to the pitch. He was astounding for the period of time it took him to walk from one side of the pitch to the other, before lying down to recuperate.

Wizards, already acknowledged as the best side by some distance with wins of 9-0 and 13-2 on the first day, were the Southerners' final opponents. After ten minutes the game was nil-nil and very evenly matched. Johnnie B and Jim S marshalled the defence, with Haggis running the midfield, assisted by the now-mobile Messers Thorpe and Beasley. Unfortunately cracks began to show in South's defence and Wizards used their substitutes well to allow players to rest in the stifling heat. Goal chances appeared and were generally well taken. The team remained dedicated (Johnnie B even sliding across the line to save one shot) and continued to work hard across the pitch. Wilco and Denise kept the attacking force running down each wing, supported well from midfield and even defence when possible, as the pressure mounted. Wizards' better skill, goal-hanging centre forward and chances to rest resulted in them being embarrassingly, but not shamefully, 9-0 winners.

The weekend could be summarised as not a wildly successful tournament on the pitch, but socially an absolute blast. The Wisbech Festival is already pencilled in for next season, when who knows what could happen.